I Saw The Wolf In My Sleep

I saw the Wolf in my sleep. You’d call it a nightmare; But Hear me out, okay? We were locked in an embrace, His sharp paws swiftly cruising through territories that he’s all too familia…

Source: I Saw The Wolf In My Sleep

Talmahaar

Inhaling but not really breathing,
Looking but not really seeing;
I feel like I’m half a person:
A quarter shadow, a quarter dream

It wasn’t just thoughts I shared with you;
It was also the clouds…
It was also the trees and breeze,
It was also the sounds

You leaked words from your eyes,
Spilled sex from your lips.
You played songs on my body
With tunes from your tips…

I Saw The Wolf In My Sleep

I saw the Wolf in my sleep.
You’d call it a nightmare;
But
Hear me out, okay?
We were locked in an embrace,
His sharp paws swiftly cruising through territories that he’s all too familiar with.
Maybe it was the comfort of his familiarity that I craved,
Are you, in fact, telling me that this comfort isn’t long overdue?
I could hear the ocean inside of him
And how can that be a nightmare?
It felt like parts of me were finally glued together
So what if they weren’t glued together right?
At least they weren’t falling apart…
Maybe he didn’t whisper sweet nothings in my ear
But I could still hear
His rib cage expanding into a breath;
‘Twas the closest I’d been to a person’s heartbeat in so damn long.
So what if his kisses made me bleed,
Or if looking into his cold eyes sent chills down my spine?
What if his nail’s etched fresh wounds on the sides of my thighs…
He was just caressing what he loved,
Right?
So what if he only made room for skin,  not words?
He was just a Wolf being a wolf, you silly girl…

But you call it a nightmare,
So answer me this:
Why does waking up into real life feel worse?
Why does this morning feel like I’m not me,
But fragments of me scattered all over the floor?
Eyes that return from nightmare don’t long for more;

I hope you never know the horror of waking up into a nightmare
Instead of waking up from one…

I Once Met A Moon, A Star And A Sunflower

I once met a Moon, a Star and a Sunflower…

The Star I knew from a distance,
A great distance.
Her soul was a billion years old and yet she wasn’t cold;
She was warm,
She was hot
With explosions and chaos and god knows what;
But that wasn’t for me to see,
All I could see was her twinkle,
Her promise to shine
With her brightest glow,
Her tireless hope fueling millions of sparks every second.
Oh she was glorious…
She made me believe that tiny specs could light up the darkest skies.
She can light up the darkest skies.

The Moon was present;
Silent yet present…
There was no way you could escape her presence,
No way you could pass by her every night and not be in complete awe of her existence.
I watched her shrink and I watched her grow,
Waning and waxing;
Over and over.
Soft yet solid
So new, so young;
Romancing the Ocean, leading the Sky on…
A spirit so self-ruling, so self-directing
That it emancipated my own.
I didn’t need to hold her to bask in the moonlight;
Her light was music and cigarette smoke and everything you cannot escape,
Everything that calms the beating drums in your chest
She calms the beating drums in my chest

The Sunflower though,
Was mine to hold
She was mine to love
From the soul in my bones.
We shared bottles and battles late into the night;
It felt right
Something, for the first time, felt right…
We cut ourselves open, and the same blood poured.
Maybe we never shared a womb, but did share a wound.
My Sunflower girl, you helped me heal
When you took me in;
Made me a home out of my very own skin.
My Sunflower girl, you made me believe
That I’m more than burning tears
And reckless scars
And shoe-bites at parties.
That I didn’t need bras for support
Or silly boys tugging at my sleeve, validating me…
And every once in a while,
On the darkest night, you’d make me feel like the Sun,
In a bodycon armour, (lungs full of smoke)
Armed with lipstick swords and fun.

While it is true, that I really do,
I do love the Moon and the Star,
It’ll always be my Sunflower girl
Whom I hold closest to my heart.